Dr. Snider spoke at Berean's summer retreat, giving us 5 sermons on holy affections. I wasn't really sure what that meant going into retreat but it seemed to be holy emotions, affections just sounds cooler haha. In order, Dr. Snider talked to us about Humility, Anger, Love, Sorrow, and Joy, drawing from God's example of these affections in scripture.
Well humility isn't really an affection but the mode in which we ought to control our emotions. Thats right control our emotions. While our emotions are often circumstancial, the way in which we think about and reflect on those circumstances defines how we react emotionally. Not that I understand the workings of emotions but this was suggested by Dr. Snider and seems to be true. I'd like to also add that we are responsible for how we react to our emotions. I think it's understandable that circumstances can be overwhelmingly emotions, such as in a tragedy, but that does not excuse our response. How we handle our emotions is where Dr. Snider really rebuked me.
Why was I rebuked? Because I'm emotional? Haha well yes kind of, whether you thought so or not. The thing is, I'm very easily brought down or lifted up, my anger and irritation is bottled up, my love is not big enough, my joy is too conditional, and my sorrow is indulged with pity. Yet most of this is all internalized or burdening one very unlucky close friend. The problem is that I excused unedifying emotion because my emotions were internalized. As if anger was okay just because I don't yell or chew people out. Dr. Snider gave the example of road rage, how maybe you don't actually take revenge by swerving through traffic after someone cuts you off, but you might do it in your mind, and you always win. And I do always win in my mind. This is the depraved condition of my heart, expressing unedifying anger in my heart and mind, and really, what does God care about more? cutting someone off? or the selfish and unloving anger i my heart?
Tying in humility, what owns me is why do I get mad? Do I get mad because someone sins against me or because they have sinned against God? In fact, I need to be sorrowful that the person sinned and not angry that I've been inconvenienced or even hurt. Granted there is righteous and holy anger.
Yes anyway, It's late. I want to blog about more than what I read but its a little difficult.
Good night world!
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