Too many things in my life are a means and not enough things are a result. I want to finish school so i can get a job so i can pay for seminary so I can be a better instrument in glorifying God. Not that I don't try now, but I can't let myself use those aspirations as an excuse for not doing what I can now. I was very skeptical, though excited, to lead a small group because of my lack of knowledge. But then, as long as I'm not being destructive, its a horrible choice to not work for God because you don't feel like you're good enough. Because to be honest, none of us are ever going to be good enough, as leaders, as followers, pastors, children...
Anyways, I want to be more focused on now and not so worried about the future. The future will come and I have minimal control over it in light of God's sovereignty, which is awesome and I'm glad I'm not in control. The best I can do is be in prayer and discerning with the issues and situations at hand. Be more studious, don't wait to have time, make time, don't plan to be financially responsible, but be responsible now, etc
I told my small group in the most Christian sense "go big or go home" there will be no half heartedness here!
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